by Mitchell Geller
About Poetry Forum
Honorable Mention, August 2007
Judged by Deborah Bogen

I built my own constricting carapace
from chemicals ingested lavishly,
and wished, with fervor, merely to be numb.
Insensible, I watched myself become
a grim, distorted pasquinade of me,
devoid of kindness, sympathy and grace.

Insomnia, anxiety and grief
have made me recreant, bitter with fear.
I know, my love, that you’d be horrified
at my behavior since the day you died —
not, as you chaffed, in love within the year,
but still marooned on this spiritless reef.

Forgive, my love, the arid waste you’ve seen —
a year from now my garden will be green.